Knowledge is power.

Went to the zoo last weekend. Saw a lemur? Yes, it is definitely a lemur. I know because I looked it up.

That was all I had intended to say, but then I changed my mind because it's still a good half hour before I'm going to go to sleep (yes, I plan on going to sleep at 9:30, provided my hair is dry by then) so I may as well kill some time.

I really like to read. I mean. Really. Like. To. Read. But I've been paring down my personal library, which has been pretty easy, considering the town I'm currently living has nothing resembling a book store unless you count the section labeled "Books" at Target. The nearest bookstore isn't that far away, but... I'm using it as encouragement to not buy anything that won't potentially fit into a handful of boxes in 6 months. Also, I'm planning on jumping on the e-reader bandwagon at some point in the not too distant future, so. Anyway.

In lieu of reading books... well, in addition to reading the increasingly well-worn copies of the books I own and have decided to bring up here with me, I've started the search for interesting reading material on the internet. There are some webcomics that I always read, a few blogs, my email over and over (I really like checking my email, it's like a trip to the mailbox minus the walking and the disappointment when nothing's there), but I wanted more! And I've found more! Well. A little!

One of the blogs I have recently begun to read has been TheBloggess.com, and I was struck by an entry in which Jenny wrote about being furiously happy in response to some way un-fun and bad things that had been happening. I like this concept a lot. It's like a way of spiting life, but only when life is being really crappy and mean and points and laughs at you about it. So I tried it today. Not because my day was particularly bad, but it was particularly long, and fairly un-fun and at one point one of my students actually walked past me, paused and asked, "Are you alright?"
Which I was. It's just striking that a 16 year old boy (probably not a section of humanity known for being particularly perceptive) picked up that it seemed like I wasn't. (Nothing against 16 year old boys. Or 16 year olds in general.)

So I guess we can call these baby steps. I am going to try to force myself to be happy now, when days are not so bad, or okay, or even pretty normal. So that when that fateful day comes, and everything is TERRIBLE, I will be prepared to toss my hair scornfully at life and make rude gestures at it behind its back. I am practicing.

It was going pretty well 'til I decided to watch last night's episode of Glee, and then I cried. Ohhhh, I cried. To be fair, it doesn't take a lot to make me cry, I can tear up at just about anything except for Titanic and anything involving Nicholas Sparks. But I'm almost consistently a sucker about watching sadness. It makes me feel sad, and then my life is sucked into a whirling vortex of sadness and I forget entirely about being happy, furiously or not. Not for long, fortunately, but for long enough to make me write this kind of blog entry about it.

I know this is all terrible fascinating, and may come up on Jeopardy someday, so I'm glad I got to impart this information to anyone who happens to read this at some undetermined point in the future.