To dance and to drown

 The video (above, it's right ^ there, can you see it?) is one of the new bands I'm obsessing over. I actually bought the CD! It was amazing, I haven't bought any new music in years, it feels like. But they're so happy, even when they're not, and the lead singer's voice resonates with me and.. come on, they have an accordion and a trumpet player. How can that not be awesome?

So I guess the dance wasn't so bad. It was interesting to see some of my students in a less-structured environment... the kids who, in class, were quiet or shy suddenly felt comfortable running around, dancing like mad, or twirling in circles. Is that how I was when I was 17? I want to say "no", but deep down, the answer is probably "yes".

As a teacher, I do a lot of time reflecting on my own youth. This is actually new to me, when I was teaching overseas, I never compared myself to my students. I'm not sure why that is... people are people no matter where you go, right? But maybe it was the new surroundings, maybe it was that the environment differed so drastically from the one that I was brought up in, maybe it was that they were 5 and learning (and communicating functionally) in a new language, as opposed to when I was five, and playing in ponds.
Here, though, the things these kids do... some of them I relate to. Some of them I rail against. It's strange. I thought I could honestly say that I, in my own young semi-adulthood, was nothing like the students of today. But maybe that's because I was focusing on the wrong students. From the behavior I saw last night, which was hyper, ridiculously enthused, slightly attention-starved, awkward and then not awkward... well, some of it reminded me a lot of me. It's kind of a blow to my ego, and now I have to either be less secure in my own moral superiority at seventeen, or just get over it. Or just pretend like I never had these thoughts and remain secure in my standing that, at that age, I was a prodigy who always behaved with the proper decorum for each situation.

Anyway, I ran over a frog last night. 80% sure. It was hopping across the road, but I only saw it too late because a) it was a little old frog, and b) it was dark. I wanted to slam on the brakes to let it pass, but there was a car right behind me, and they would probably have crashed into me, and what was I going to tell them? Sorry about the car accident, but I had to stop on the road for a hopping frog? I feel a disporportionate sense of guilt over the whole matter. I mean, yeah, it was a frog, but then again, it was a happy little hopping frog and I killed it. Like a monster.